How to Relieve Stress when Pregnant

Stress seems to be taking over our country these days; not only is life stressful enough but being pregnant adds a whole new list of things that will stress you out. But of course you are no stranger to this that is why you are here right?

More than likely your body (or baby) will start telling you you are stressed before your mind does. Your body may feel achy, you might get frustrated, you may get extremely irritable and sometimes not even feel like getting up in the morning.

More important than you feeling like crap, your baby may be affected by your stress. Stress can cause complications for your child later in the pregnancy or later in life. You probably also feel the energy drain that  all this brings. All the energy you are using to deal with this is being taken away from the development of your baby. Would you like most of your energy to be used to develop a strong baby or to deal with stress?

This blog post will talk about common places of stress for young mothers, how to deal with the stress and how to CHILL OUT.

Stress from being Pregnant.

A lot of stress comes from just being a young mother. Most just accept that it comes with the territory, but I personally believe that being pregnant should be a wonderful experience. OK realistically, yes it will probably  not feel great and your body is going to go through things you could go your entire life not going through. But with all the pain aside it should be a happy experience.

Here are some common issues pregnancy will bring:

Being Judged - Unfortunately this is all too common for young mothers. No one wants to feel like they are any less of a person because of what they are going through in life. Good news is that you don't have to.

First off you have to understand that others just don't understand, and you have to keep your head held high. People will judge you for almost everything you do ("why does she like that shirt? Why does she like that song? Why does she like him"?) -who cares? Are you going to let someone else's opinions affect the health of your baby?

Being in Pain - No one wants likes to be in pain. Each pregnancy is different but a majority of the time there will be pain. How to deal with the pain:

• Use pain medicine accepted by your doctor
• Buy a heating pad and use it when necessary
• Use muscle rub such as Bengay but be sure to make sure it is ok'd by your doctor.
• Get yourself a massage.
• Take a nice relaxing bath

Feeling Yucky - Pregnancy is a beautiful, although sometimes as your body changes you don't feel so beautiful. You deserve to feel beautiful! When you are feeling kind of down, you need to treat yourself.

• Buy a nice outfit for yourself; as you get further into your pregnancy you may need to add a few things in your wardrobe. Since when was this a bad thing? Buy something that will make you feel sexy and enjoy yourself as you shop.
• Get a pedicure and/or manicure. Go take sometime and pamper yourself!  
• Take the focus off yourself and think about how beautiful that little baby will be when it is born. Try to picture what it will look like and put a smile on your face!

Stress in your Relationships

There may be times when you and the people are you do not get along too well. This happens to everyone, pregnant or not. It may be a family member, a friend or your significant other who does not understand what you are going through.

Remember that arguments are a two way street. You may feel like you are the victim but you are also the one who can may things better. Talk with the person, and find out why they are mistreating you. STAY CALM no matter what. 93% of all communication is nonverbal. If you enter the conversation with a sense of understanding in your voice it will allow the conversation to go a lot smoother.

Take into consideration what the other person is saying to you. Is it fair? Does it make sense? Is there anything you can do to minimize the distress within the relationship. Also take into consideration that not everything is your fault. Some people may actually just be treating you poorly. Sometimes you may need to spend less time with these people in order to kill some of the stress.

The best thing to do in my opinion is find more people who can encourage you. Having 10 people who make you laugh and smile and encourage you will eliminate most of the stress that 1 or 2 people can bring you.

Financial Stress
This happens to a lot of people whether they are single, married, have kids, or don't. Try to relax and stay calm, I will do my best to help you with some financial assistance.

• Find assisted programs that will provide financial help and food for you. 
• Go to those who are willing to help you if needed. There is no shame in wanting to take care of your baby. 
• Find a good money management book/program. A big problem may be that you are spending too much on unnecessary things but don't realize it. Trust me... when I heard this I thought "I'm not spending money on anything! especially not unnecessary things." But I had found that I was wasting over $50 a month on things that could be avoided.  (Fast food!!) 
• You may not agree with this one but just stay calm. Sometimes it looks like there is no way you will make it financially but very often something comes along and provides exactly what you need. Try not to let financial stress hold you and your baby down. 

Stress at Work and School

School and work are stressful places within themselves. Being pregnant sometimes just makes things worse. The best advice I got from the love of my life was that you have to get through it for you and your baby. You've gone through so much already, just do what you can to get through the days. 

Go into work and school with the understanding that everyday you are making steps to creating a better life for your baby. If you are working or still in school, give yourself a pat on the back! Many girls can't handle it,  but you know you need to do what you have to do. 

If stress is really getting to you, find a group of people who can help support and encourage you. I also heard from some women that they try to make it as fun as possible so that days go by fast. Do what you need to do to make it through! It will be worth it in the end.  

Fathers of the Baby Look Here

If you are a pregnant mother and the father is not reading this with you, get up and go get him now. Dad, this is the most important time for you to step up. I know you see yourself wanting to do all this fun stuff with your child as you are raising them and you probably have no idea how you can even help right now, but listen up.

This is a really important time for you to step up as a father, a boyfriend/husband, and as a man. Your woman needs you now. Believe me, this can be just as painful for you as it is for her if you do not take care of her. I know what you are thinking, " I don't know what the heck to do, I've never gone through this before." But it is your job to help relieve some of that stress she has.

1. Make sure your new family is taken care of financially. AKA get a job! There needs to be no excuse of you can't find one, especially if you are sitting on your butt watching TV more than an hour a day. McDonalds around here is always hiring! You may have to put your dignity aside for awhile and work somewhere you don't want but you have to do what you have to do for your child. Eventually something better will come... Trust me. 
2. Be her defender. Don't start fights with her, try to understand where she is coming from. She may also start stressing about her relationships with her friends, or family members so it is up to you to help her feel loved and that she has not messed up her life. 
3. She is going to be stressed out about things just because she is pregnant. So make her feel better.

• Let her know you are in it with her, and that you love her and that baby. 
• Help her when she is achy and in pain. There may not be much you can do, but give her massages when you can and try to give her a helping hand so she can try to stay off her feet as much as possible.
• Make her feel beautiful. Even if you think she knows... You still better tell her. Even when she denies... just keep saying. Pregnancy is a confusing time but you need to just keep making sure she feels loved.

Just be there for her above anything else. Take care of her physically, financially and mentally. It may seem like a lot to do but she is also going through a lot. Be in it with her. Take care of her. 

Mothers remember that pregnancy will not last forever, but it will shape your baby's following years. Make sure it is safe and taken care of. Do not allow something like stress affect the health of your baby. If you or the father need assistance, then just comment below. Others or myself can try to point you in the right direction.